Saturday, March 31, 2007

Today I'm writing about something more personal. My youngest daughter is making her communion in a few weeks. As I waited outside the door at her religious education class the other day I overheard a group of 3 mothers talking about the parties they were having for their children after the service.

One mother was having a DJ, videographer and sit down dinner at a local restaurant. She kept going on and on about "her party." She spoke of the $300 communion gown she purchased for her daughter. Another mother spoke about having "her party" the day after her son's communion so she could combine his communion party with her daughter's baby shower. Still another spoke about the "open bar" and "buffet" for "her party" and reserving "the mansion" at $34.95 a head and she had to have at least 50 people.

I continued to stare at the wall ahead of me waiting for my daughter's class to be dismissed and wishing I could get the heck out of there. Then one of the mother's asked me, "So what are you doing for your daughter?" I turned and said, "I'm making her dress and then we are having dinner at RIMBY's (a local family restaurant)." She looked at me and said, "That's all? You're not doing more?" I said, "No, that's it." A look of horror crossed the 3 mother's faces. The mother then said, "You are not doing enough for your daughter."

My response was, "My daughter is making her communion. That's what the day is about. Not a fancy party, not people drinking all day and not about my party." They looked at me like I had lost my mind.

Later that night I talked to my husband. I asked him if I was crazy for keeping things simple for what is a big step in our daughter's religious life. She is very excited about making her communion. She has been blessing herself with holy water several times a day. She actually understands that it's about receiving the Lord in a miraculous way. She is so happy and serene. My husband said he has no doubts that we are doing things the way they should be done. Our memories of communion are making our communion, having a few simple family pictures taken and spending time with our closest family members at a small intimate family party with people we see all the time.

He said if I was so concerned over if we were doing the right thing to talk to Kiera, our daughter. So I sat her down and asked her if having dinner with our closest family and the restaurant was still okay with her. She said, "I love RIMBY's and we'll have a great time there." I asked her if she still wanted me to make her dress. She said, "I'm glad you're making my dress because you are making it with love."

So out of the mouths of babes I have my answer.

1 comment:

Mad Fashionista said...

Out of the mouths of babes, indeed. Mama did not give us formal religious training, which was a source of great consternation to my governess. The main thing it meant to me was that I did not have to wear a hat first thing Sunday mornings. It is indeed lovely that it is so truly meaningful to your daughter, dahling, and to you. To paraphrase myself (and why not?) those are Family Values In The True Sense.

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